All sheet sets at Macy’s 20% off.
Invite the NSA to your barbecue.
See May 11.
Mattress sale at Macy’s.
I always wear black.
Translation: Cinco de Mayo. Or, May 5, 2014.
Take the Earth to lunch.
Don’t look at me.
May 6, 2014
158 W. 72nd St., New York, NY 10023
The legendary comic performs, with all proceeds from merchandise sold going towards local rescue organizations.
Read the listing in New York Magazine. Check out the “New York Dating” feature and find someone to go with.
See April 1.
I’ll be appearing at (will a booker please fill this in dammit!!)
See April 20.
Chanukah. Channukah? Hannukah? Jannukah?
Leave the turkeys alone.
Every pillow top mattress at Macy’s comes with a free bed frame and delivery.
Let’s not even go there (and he didn’t, actually.)