See May 11.
Mattress sale at Macy’s.
I always wear black.
Translation: Cinco de Mayo. Or, May 5, 2014.
Take the Earth to lunch.
Don’t look at me.
See April 1.
I’ll be stuck in NYC traffic.
They have Costco in NY now. Why? NY apartments are tiny. I went to Costco there and bought the toilet paper. It’s my couch.
From our Dec 2013 trip to China, land of mysterious signage. China IS the “consumption trap”, but I don’t know what the “comsumption trap” is.
I’ll be appearing at (will a booker please fill this in dammit!!)
See April 20.
Chanukah. Channukah? Hannukah? Jannukah?
Leave the turkeys alone.
Every pillow top mattress at Macy’s comes with a free bed frame and delivery.
I’ll be setting my clocks ahead. Back? Back. Back?
Finally, I’m wearing the right amount of make-up.
Let’s not even go there (and he didn’t, actually.)